Why Doesn't GOD Answer My Prayers?

Every year various national polls indicate that almost 70% of the world pray.

Most come to the great Giver looking for gifts. After all, Jesus did say, "The Father will give you whatever you ask in my name" (John 15:16 NIV).

So why doesn't it work all the time?

I have prayed asking for my family to be restored, for my car to make it to the next exit before running out of gas, for the perfect job, for God to heal my dying friend, and for a husband. And, nothing. At times, I have ended up feeling more distant than ever and disconnected from the invisible God. Sadly, I had missed the point. God wants more for us, not more requests from us.

When we are young it's easy to talk to parents about what we want. "Mom, why can't I watch this program, or I want pizza for dinner." "Dad, I want to stay up later, just one more hour..." When we get to teen-years, we talk to almost everyone, but our parents. Then, as adults we check in briefly on family days. 

Now, after our parents are gone, we long to sit and talk about life, dreams, decisions, and struggles. We wish for time, just to talk. 

That's what prayer is: it's talking to God about life. Do you talk to Him about your discoveries, your surprises, your dreams,embarrassments, questions, and joys? Do you confess your weaknesses, your failures, your mess-ups? Do you ask Him to help you forget and forgive? Do you long to have an inside track, to see what He's up to? To share His secrets?

Do you talk back to Him, vent your frustrations, and struggle with the whys and why nots? When you finally understand how things are working together for good, do you share that with Him? Do you ask for courage to do what you already know you need to do? Do you pray for open eyes to see what God sees, to feel what He feels, to hear what He hears?

Do you ask Him to put people in your path who need to see an authentic believer? Do you ask for assignments, for opportunities to make Him proud? Do you thank Him for the adventures and discoveries and wonders along the way? Do you stop long enough for Him to write grace and peace on your heart?

God wants you to grow up, to learn how to be responsible and mature. He wants you to learn to make wise decisions. So, He doesn't jump at your every request. 

He can open doors no man can shut and He can close doors no man can open, so should we just sit around waiting for doors to open? Or should we kick some of the doors open. Some of the great adventures of life are poised and positioned behind doors we have to kick open. In fact, the kicking of the doors is part of what makes it a God thing. Trust me, if God wants the door closed, you will not be able to kick it open.

I have learned:

When I ask God about a problem, or an opportunity, or a difficulty, or a healing, or a rescue, and I don't get an obvious answer, I make a choice to move ahead—to do something. Waiting on the Lord, doesn't mean hanging around the house doing nothing. This waiting gig is more about God changing me into His image, than me waiting to get an answer.

And if God wants you to tackle what's behind door number 2, He will blow it open. It will be unmistakable. That's the kind of thing He loves to do. It will clearly be a miracle moment. The Bible is full of these kinds of events.

Shahlohm.. :)

A House For Your Soul.

Do you want a house for your soul? 

You may ask, "How much does it cost?" Something less than proud human nature would like to pay. It is without money and without price. But you would like to pay a respectable rent! You would love to do something to win Christ? Then you cannot have the house, for it is without price.

Will you take my Master's house on a lease for all eternity, with nothing to pay for it, nothing but the rent of loving and serving Him forever? Will you take Jesus and dwell in Him? This house is furnished with all you want; it is filled with riches more than you can spend as long as you live. In this house you can have intimate communion with Christ and feast on His love; the tables are well-stocked with food for you to live on forever; in it, when weary, you can find rest with Jesus; and from it you have a view of heaven itself.

Will you have the house? If you are homeless, you will say, "I should like to have the house; but may I have it?" Yes; the key is, "Come to Jesus." "But," you say, "I am too shabby for such a house." Never mind; there are garments inside. If you feel guilty and condemned, come; and though the house is too good for you, Christ will make you good enough for the house soon enough. He will wash you and cleanse you, and you will yet be able to sing, "We dwell in Him."

Believer, your happiness will be multiplied in having such a dwelling-place! What a privilege for you to live in such a secure dwelling--a place of safety. And dwelling in Him, you have not only a perfect and secure house, but an everlasting one. When this world shall have melted like a dream, our house shall live and stand more imperishable than marble, more solid than granite, self-existent as God, for it is God Himself--"We abide in him."

Relationships

How To Detect Arrogant People

Do you always seem to cross paths with people who are stuck on themselves, intolerant of people different from them, rude or downright arrogant? These people can be a great source of potential pain, and this article is here to help you sort the arrogant from the not-so-arrogant.

Pay attention to their conversations. Don't eavesdrop, but when they're talking to you or to those around you, listen to them. Is it always about them? Do they get mad or irritated if the centre of attention moves to someone else? These are good signs of arrogance.

• Arrogance and smugness is often a reflection of limited life experience, and feeling concerned that those with greater life experience "have got something over them". Rather than seeking to find out more through questions and learning (actions viewed by them as showing vulnerability), arrogant people tend to generalize from their limited, narrow life experiences and try to impose their small worldview on others.
• Jealousy of your achievements or seeming lifestyle can cause another person to feel smug or arrogant about something they think they do better than you or own/have that you don't.
• Arrogant people have an extremely strong need to look good. When you make them look bad- even if it is the slightest offense- they will usually be very mad at you. This happens when you question (or at least seem to question) their appearance, intelligence, athletic abilities, or anything else relating to their self-image.

Challenge their worldview. Don't be aggressive––just skeptical and curious. If they get upset, gauge their anger. If it's minimal, they may be simply having a bad day. But if they're enraged, then they may see you as questioning their 'perfect little world.' And having one of those is usually indicative of arrogance.

• At some point or another, most people realize that the world doesn't revolve around them. Arrogant people counteract this by creating an atmosphere that centers around them, and get angry if they're reminded of the real world.
• Ambiguity frightens arrogant people because it suggests imperfection, change and lack of certainty (realities we all must contend with as best we can). As such, instead of accepting that the world behaves randomly and at times totally averse to one's preferences, the arrogant person seeks to control everything and everyone, which of course, is an impossible mission.
• Reality hurts when it intrudes; as such, an arrogant person is less likely than other people to self-reflect or analyse, thereby not seeing their own imperfections. They may also give themselves undue credit for positive achievements instead of acknowledging the input of others or of circumstances.

Learn the quality of their friendships. Don't be nosy or gossipy, but if they are happy with someone one day and hateful with them the next, that's a sign of them having a lot of fair weather friends. That's a sign of arrogance, since it is very hard to be a truly good friend to someone who's stuck on themselves. Prideful people have a strong need to look good, and being self-sufficient is an effective way to do that. Since being a good friend to someone usually means helping them, they often can't stand the thought of a good friendship.

• Ironically, arrogant people often can't understand why they don't have any reliable and supportive friends.

How do they treat those not like themselves? In other words, how do they treat those with different beliefs, cultural backgrounds and ways of seeing the world? If it's inherently negative, then they're either over-zealous, ignorant of other people or what to avoid those that contradict their fantasy land that caters to them and them only. Determine this based on their general personality and the people they're interacting with.

• Many times prideful people have a serious 'my-way's-the-only-way' attitude. This is simply a protective mechanism for their false image or their fantasy land.

What's their personality like? Take note of how they act, talk, and use their social status. Do they have a general sense of'coolness?' Are they a chatterbox? Do they act like they own the place, or act like the 'big dog?' Are they very keen on their self-image?

• Many arrogant people have a false charm that no one seems to see through. But the arrogant person is usually more than happy to show their cruel side to those that they don't like.
• When they are cruel, their friends will usually ignore it or not do anything to stop it since they're afraid that they'll be treated badly by their 'friend.'

Mention people you know that they don't like. This isn't meant to begin a conflict, but to gauge their rivalries, annoyances and enmities. If their condemnation seems to be reasonable, they probably aren't hubristic. If it's harsh, they are.

• For the most part, arrogant people see people that they don't like as threats to their perfect little world. The more they hate someone, the more dangerous that person is to their fantasy land. And in turn, the bigger the threat, the harsher the criticism.

Ask around to see what they've been saying about you. If they have been saying bad things about you, they may simply not like you. If they're nice to your face, but talk bad about you behind your back like it's their favourite hobby, then they probably have a problem with pride.

Arrogant people often subconsciously know that they don't have any good friends. They compensate for this by creating the impression that they have a lot of friends- they have a 'quantity, not quality' mentality. Then they simply insult their trophy friends when they aren't looking.

Be compassionate. Don't be judgmental of arrogant people or you risk having as negative an outlook as they do. Arrogant people are often trying to hide certain vulnerabilities and fears. Most of the time, the need for a strong and unquestionable self-image comes out of deeply rooted pain. Obviously, you also don't need to be taken in by their claims to be superior over you. Stay principled and detached. But you can reach out and see the genuine good in them and praise what is real, rather than perceived or forced, talent. Sometimes having someone push through the brusqueness can free the arrogant person to be much truer to themselves, allowing them to stop shielding themselves so fiercely.

• An enormous amount of vulnerability tends to hide behind arrogance. This leads to overcompensating, so that the vulnerability is deeply suppressed. For example, if an arrogant person grew up poor but later becomes rich, he or she may be snobbish about everything they can now afford because they are covering up the fear of poverty from the past.

Tips

• Always remember that there's a big difference between being assertive and being arrogant. Equally, some people are very anxious rather than arrogant, and it is anxiety that causes them to dominate a conversation or to try and prove themselves as good as you. You can tell the difference by looking for empathy. An assertive or nervous person will check for your responses and even ask questions, while an arrogant person will ignore your needs and you completely and will continue to lack respect for your perspective.
• Make sure you're not being arrogant. If you are, tone it down and look at the situation objectively, or in a non-biased way.
• Stay away from arrogant people as much as you can. They can cause you a lot of pain in your life. On the other hand, learning to deal with them in short bursts is a useful skill that can help you get on board good people in teams, at work, in sports, etc., provided they are aware that you won't tolerate their smug shenanigans. It doesn't always do to run away from others or you could be running all your life!
• When it comes to dealing with arrogant people, they nearly always have something to protect: either their self-image or their self-centred universe. If they get the impression that you're questioning either one, they will dislike you. Learn to live with that because it isn't about you at all; it's totally about their inability to control you.
• When it comes to popularity contests, why are they popular? Is it because they treat their friends decently, or because they are simply 'cool' to hang out with?
• Simply because someone's 'cool' to be around doesn't mean that they treat people respectfully. The main things that make people 'cool' are completely superficial: they're either rich, attractive, athletic, have a good personality (to those that fit their friendship criteria) or have a fake charm (that soon dissembles if you anger them when alone). Arrogant people can have all or a mix of these (and other) traits.
• Do they joke about people who shouldn't be joked about? Making fun of someone going through a hard time is a sign of wanting cheap laughs, and not caring about other people's emotions.
• Prideful people usually could care less about how people feel, since they nearly always have a difficult time empathizing with others.
• People going through a difficult time are often the target of jokes and insults by arrogant people. But these comments are made only when they're around people who they knowwill tolerate them, and not in the eye of the general public.
  • If you do get involved with arrogant people, and are hurt by them, don't be afraid to seek help, professional or not. (Don't let that info get out, though.)
  • Even though it's hard, don't hate arrogant people. They're usually trying to hide a painful past, an aspect of themselves they don't like, or have been seriously hurt by other people.Remember that they could be hurt by the same things that have hurt you, but they're simply addressing their pain in the wrong (unhealthy) way. Instead of resolving it, they're hiding it. This pain can express itself as arrogance, among many other things.
• Arrogant people also have a very hard time accepting apologies.
  • This is particularly true if you've questioned their fantasy land or have seriously questioned (or have seemed to question) their self-image.
• Arrogant people usually don't have truly good friends. Remember this when you wish you were as 'popular' as they are.
• A summary of symptoms of arrogance include: intolerance of people different from themselves, inability to see different points of view, extremely harsh criticism of those they don't like, inability to form long-lasting relationships, and general narcissism.

Warning

• If they get in your face, leave or just ignore them and continue doing what you're doing. What makes them madder than anything is ignoring them, giving into them is giving them the satisfaction of knowing they have gotten to you. They are simply trying to inflate their ego, and insulting or arguing with them will inflate it a lot. Leaving will too, but not nearly as much, all they want is attention, because they are insecure.
  • Depending on the situation, leaving might make them look stupid. They will hate you for this, but who wants to keep company with a total jerk?
• No matter how much you might want to say something nasty to them, don't! It will do no good anyway. Don't go into platitudes about how arrogance is wrong. Just give a quick answer and let them understand that you don't want them in your life, being assertive doesn't necessarily mean putting things into words; be on your look-out; be smarter than them.
  • If they've back-stabbed you, point this out. No one–not even the arrogant person's best 'friends'- appreciate that behaviour.
• Ironically, if you do win the argument or fight, they'll start playing the 'Victim' card, and start appealing to their 'friends' to not only help them feel good, but also make you look bad.
  • If the arrogant person is considered 'cool' by a lot of people, their use of the Victim card could make you an outcast. Act discreetly when confronting cool people with an ample entourage.
• If you have to vent about an arrogant person, do so only to your best friends who won't tell anyone else. If your anger becomes common knowledge, it will start a conflict.
  • There's a good chance that the prideful person won't understand why you don't like them. Just ignore their rude behaviour, and use a short and smart comeback if you must.
• Don't pay lip service to their perfect world. This will not only help you stay true to yourself, but may help them to see things differently.
  • Don't actually attack their fantasy land. Instead, say something like "I don't agree with you on that" or "I have different opinions on this". They might get angry, but these chances aren't as high as they would be if you questioned their self-centered universe outright.
  • Instead of saying "Maybe if you'd get over yourself, you'd see things for what they are", try saying "What makes you say that?" or "Why do you hold that opinion?" This forces the person to answer a very direct, factual question.
• One of the symptoms of any antisocial personality disorder is arrogance and disrespect for other people's rights. This is a dangerous aspect of arrogant people; if you have to live with a person like this, seek advice.
  • This is why some arrogant people go on to become criminals.
• Keep in mind that there may be a psychological difficulty that may come across as arrogance (seeming aloof or closed off or insecure with a false sense of self). In some cases, this could be bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder or a social phobia. It could be many things like a history of abuse or illness or bullying. Some people don't realize that their behavior marginalizes them from others and stops them from making friends. Be aware that while it is easy to call anyone "arrogant" as a wholesale generalization of a person's character, take into account your own mood, their mood, environmental conditions and life circumstances. Sometimes what people do or say has nothing to do with you. Be careful when you assume they're acting in a certain way to specifically to upset or anger you. Be smarter than them.

This article was taken from here. ;)

Do Not Take Revenge

It is mine to avenge; I will repay. (Deuteronomy 32:35)

Tit for tat is how we like it sometimes. If someone doesn't invite us for some get together, we remember to "forget" them when we play host. When someone doesn't pick up our calls, we don't either. Agree, this is in the simplest form, but what I mean to say is, avenging or repaying is in our blood, even if in it's minuscule form. One might argue it is only natural.

But let us ask ourselves: Is it not the "natural sin" the blood of Jesus Christ has delivered us from? If we behave the same way like everyone else, what difference we make as believers.

We are done wrong, I do not deny that. But let's move past that not letting anyone or anything take up space in our minds making us dwell on thoughts of how to avenge or repay them back.

The Scriptures promise us time and time again that it is the Lord's to avenge. But sometimes it may seem to take forever for Him to do anything on our behalf. That's when King David cried out in Psalm 94:1, "O LORD, the God who avenges, O God who avenges, shine forth."

Sometimes it may appear we are given an easy opportunity to pay back in vengeance. Let us be careful not to fall into that tempting trap. Remember King Saul was right there for King David to avenge, but he had clearly made up his mind against that. He said in 1 Samuel 26:10-11 "...the LORD himself will strike him; either his time will come and he will die, or he will go into battle and perish. But the LORD forbid that I should lay a hand on the LORD's anointed..."

Here are few more verses to remind us in those lines:

* Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath. (Romans 12:19)

* Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against one of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. (Leviticus 19:18)

Say 'NO'

This is something I really need to share here on my blog. ^^

This article was written by Bob and Debby Gass, and it really blessed me, especially today, after experiencing a very painful storm in my life. 

SAY 'NO!'

by Bob & Debby Gass

'...Just say a simple...no...' James 5:12 NLT

When you don't learn to say no, you end up disliking yourself, as well as the people you are trying to please. In some cases we have difficulty saying it because we're afraid people won't like us. In other cases we believe that to be 'a good Christian' we must always say yes.

Jesus said, '...Let...your no be [a simple] no, so that you may not sin...' (James 5:12 AMP). Only when you have the courage to say no will you mature, be able to address your own unmet needs, and start respecting yourself. And in time, others will too.

So do these three things: 

(1) Think before you respond. If you need to, say, 'Can I get back to you?' Don't make commitments without consulting God, your calendar, and your family. 'If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and He will give it to you...' (James 1:5 NLT). 

((Many women caught up in unhealthy relationship with wrong men. They have been through breakups, on and off relationship with an abusive or drunk boyfriend and they just can't say NO to them. Well ladies, just say NO if they want to crawl back into your life. GOD already provides you the best man, someone He created from the beginning just for you. Just say NO, and wait for the LORD! ^^ <= my opinion!)) ;)

(2) When your plate's full, say so. Responding to so-called emergencies caused by somebody else's poor planning and sloppy habits won't do either of you any good. Limit what you say yes to, then stick with it. Don't take on more because you feel pressured, guilty or indispensable  You'll discover that you're only indispensable until you say NO - or DIE! 

(3) Go with your gifts. God has given each of us unique talents. If you have to choose between singing in the choir or sitting on the finance committee, go where your talents will be best utilized. Is this always easy? No, but unless you learn to do it you'll end up investing too much time and energy in what seems urgent, and neglect what's important. 

(SoulFood: 2 Chronicle 25-28, Luke 20:41-47, Psalm 78:1-8, Pr 20:7-10).

Learn to say NO to certain things or people is necessary. We cannot keep saying YES to bad things or people especially when it comes to important things in life. We cannot just follow our heart or feelings or judgments without consulting it first to the LORD. Take time to pray and ask the LORD to lead you with His Holy Spirit. He will tell you what to do. And saying  NO to bad things or people will be a proof that you obey the LORD more than your own feelings. :)

Just say 'NO'! ^^

Getting Rid of Mr Wrong

They said that there's a rainbow after rain. Ahh....I hope it's not just a quote or some wise words.

Putus dengan pacar bukan akhir dari segala-galanya kan? Dunia masih berputar, detik masih berganti dan jantung masih berdetak. At least itu yang terjadi padaku. Ga ada yang berubah selain ga ada lagi komunikasi yang biasanya intense terjadi setiap hari. Sedih sih udah pasti. Banget. Tapi kan ada Tuhan yang beri kekuatan dan kemampuan untuk ngelewatin hari demi hari. And I try to look at the bright side of this matter.

Hal yang terutama adalah aku bersyukur banget bisa keluar dari hubungan yang ga sehat itu. Ga sehat? Ya karena sebenernya dari awal aku udah tau dia bukan orang yang tepat buatku. Dari awal-awal hubungan ini berjalan aku udah ragu dan terus merasa ragu sepanjang 5 bulan hubungan kami. Keraguan itu dikalahkan oleh rasa sepi dan keinginan untuk memiliki seseorang dan akhirnya kompromi demi kompromipun terjadi.

As a grown up and a woman of GOD, I have my own criteria of a husband and a father of my future children. That criteria has to match with the word of GOD in Bible. Kriteria-kriteria itu bukan sembarang kriteria tapi merupakan hasil perenungan dan doa selama bertahun-tahun, dan aku tau itu yang Tuhan mau aku lakukan dalam memilih pasangan hidup, put a high standard and never compromise with anything, or anyone. Kriteria-kriteria itu antara lain adalah (selain tentunya yang terutama dia harus sesorang pengikut Kristus) : dia haruslah seorang yang berdoa, seseorang yang baca Alkitab, worship GOD, hidup sesuai dengan Firman Tuhan, crazy and madly in love with me (of course lah!), loves his family and mine dan last but not least, dia haruslah seseorang yang bekerja keras dan bertanggung jawab buat keluarganya.

Dan waktu bertemu dengan Mr Wrong 5 bulan yang lalu, aku mulai mencari-cari adakah kriteria-kriteria tersebut di dalam dia. Of course nobody is perfect dan mencari suami dengan label dan karakter seperti diatas tidaklah gampang, bahkan boleh dibilang mustahil di dunia yang wicked, corrupt dan dikuasai oleh si iblis ini. There's no such thing is a perfect husband in this world. So berangkat dari 'pembenarn' itu, aku mulai berpikir bahwa...ah okelah sekalipun dia belum lahir baru dan belum hidup dalam Tuhan, tapi dengan kehadiranku dalam hidupnya aku berharap bisa membawa dampak yang baik dalam kehidupannya, aku bisa sharing kebenaran dan bisa mulai membawa dia pada pengenalan yang benar tentang Tuhan. After all, bukankah kira sudah seharusnya jadi ambassador of Christ dimanapun kita berada, dengan siapapun kita bersama, right? Compromise #1

And then I started to pray for him and for our relationship. I began to ask the LORD is he the right man for me, is it my part to guide him to the truth, is he gonna be the man in my life, is he gonna be the love of my life? I asked the LORD to reveal to me the real him, things that I don't know about him, I asked the LORD to let me know, things about him that only He knows. The LORD knows about him, right? He knows about everything, about his thoughts, his character, his habits etc. Things about him that I do not know. And the LORD, at that moment, didn't say anything.

BUT, He open my eyes every day to see the real Mr Wrong.

It was a great 5 months, getting to know each other, talking for hours, every single day, every morning, every  night. We loved, we laughed, we talked about everything, we made so many plans for future and we built hopes and dreams, our hopes and dreams.  Tapi selain itu aku juga mulai bisa melihat hal-hal yang bermunculan tentang dia, hal-hal yang membuat aku risih dan meragu. Sebagai orang asing yang berbeda budaya, latar belakang dan pola pikir, kami sebenarnya sangat-sangat berbeda. Kebiasaannya minum alcohol setiap weekend, pemahaman-pemahamannya yang berbeda tentang hal-hal yang prinsip buatku, seperti no sex sebelum nikah, cara pandangnya tentang pemerintah, cara dia mendiskripsikan Tuhan dan cara dia melihat masa depannya dari sudut pandangnya sebagai manusia dll. And that was very disappointing to know that we are very different on those kind of matters. Tapi aku mencba bertahan dengan dalih ini kan proses pengenalan yang harus kami lewti, of course agak-agak mengagetkan, but I believe he will change, he will quit drinking, he will start praying, start to read Bible, he will become a man GOD one day. Compromise #2

And one thing lead to another, and we were like sitting on the time bomb. Til one day, the bomb is finally exploded. It was crazy and sad to see how our love just turned out into a fight and misunderstanding. It was not just my mistake or his, it was OUR mistake. Ego, emotion, pride, are mixed and create pain and suffering. Well, what can I expect from a man who never lived according to the word of the LORD in his life? A forgiveness? A humble heart? A kind and pure heart?

I'm not a perfect woman. I made mistakes in life. A lots of mistakes. But I apologized and I expect people to forgive me because I will forgive people who hurt me either. So ketika kami bertengkar dan terjadi kesalahpahaman dan kemudian aku ngambek, aku juga langsung minta maaf dan berharap untuk dimaafkan and then we can continue with our relationship. Tapi yang terjadi adalah hatinya sekeras batu dan sangat sulit untuk memaafkan dan melupakan keributan-keributan kami. For him, he is always right and I'm always wrong. And that was very painful for me. He expected me to accept his drinking habit and he didn't even want to accept my 'ngambek' moment? Seriously?? Forgiveness is supposed to be the oil of relationships. And if you cannot forgive your girlfriend's small mistake, what kind of heart do you have?

What happened to my criteria? What happened to my values? Am I this stupid to stay with a man who doesn't want to forgives a little mistake and always think that he is right? What happen in the future if we get married and problems occur in our marriage and he cannot forgive and forget? My goodness. :(

There's no other way but to say goodbye to each other. And I know this is what the LORD wants me to do. In my prayer, I asked the LORD to speak to me louder. Louder, because sometimes my stupidity is beyond my hearing. Sometimes I cannot listen because I'm too deaf to hear His voice. Keinginanku untuk punya pasangan hidup kadang-kadang menutup telingaku dan aku ga bisa mendengar dengan jelas apa yang sebenarnya Tuhan mau. Dan kali ini Tuhan benar-benar berbicara dengan keras buatku, lewat masalah kami.

Sekarang kami sudah resmi berpisah. Ada rasa lega yang luar biasa yang membungkus luka di hatiku. Air mataku hanya tumpah seminggu pertama kami berdiam-diaman dan ga bicara satu sama lain. Setelah itu, yang ada cuma rasa lega dan pengucapan syukur. Yes it is hard for me. Heartbreak sucks. But I'm stronger than before. I know he's not the one for me. He is not the one the LORD has created for me. At least itu yang aku tau sekarang. Entah nantinya kami akan bertemu lagi di kemudian hari dan berjodoh, itu adalah kedaultan Tuhan, tapi saat ini yang aku tahu, aku ga bisa bersama dia lagi. Kami seperti dua kutub yang saling tolak menolak. We love each other but we also hurt each other, and that's not healthy.

Aku ingin punya suami yang berfungsi sebgai imam dan pendoa dalam keluarga. Seorang yang humble, kind, and loving. Bukan seorang pemarah yang egois dan tidak mudah memafkan. And seperti itulah gambaran Mr Wrong dimataku saat ini. How sad.

So today is a new day. It's been 7 days since our breakup on October 2nd. It sucks but it was something I should do.

GOD's Best

This is something I really need to share right now.

Are You SINGLE?? 

For those who aren't married, YET!. This may be funny to you, but God said to speak things into existence, He knows your hearts desires. HE knows you want to be married & have a family one day of our own. He knows what you want in your Husband/Wife. 

So, I challenge you, even though you don't know who your Husband/Wife is yet. Pray for them!

Speak blessings upon their life, that God keeps them from temptation, that they will prosper, have good success, good health & will wait for you.

That God gives you the strength, self-control, wisdom & patience to wait for them.
That they will first LOVE THE LORD more than they will love you. 
That your home will be blessed, your children will be blessed & your children's children's' will be blessed! 

And remember, it's in God's timing, but we can delay the timing if we seek and try and make things that shouldn't be....be! 

God already hand picked them out. 
I don't know about you, but I want God's Best!!

Broken In Spirit

Today is about being broken in spirit.

There have been times in my life when I have been broken in spirit. When broken in spirit is beyond disappointed, it’s shattered and defeated. Most of the time, you take disappointment in stride. You might feel it in your heart but mostly your ego is affected.

There is a small part of us that believes we are above failure. That if you work hard enough, it won’t happen to you. That’s simply not the case. Obstacles are a part of life. When you allow obstacles and setbacks to seep into your spirit and it catches you off guard, that’s when you become broken in spirit.

When you’re broken in spirit, you don’t have plan B, you were working hard for your passion. When so far into an endeavor, a person or venture and it doesn't go well, there will be some brokenness in the process. 

God can heal our wounds including the ones in our spirit. God will give you peace and mercy to weather the storms of life. While it may be difficult to understand and comprehend, allow God to lead on this journey. Every journey or phase in your life has purpose. Trust God and allow yourself to be emotionally present.

So today: ask God for mercy to relieve our brokenness in spirit. God has plans for all of our lives. We must allow ourselves to trust and believe there’s purpose in every moment in our lives including to the bad ones.

O Lord, thank for this day. Please forgive me for my sins. Help give me peace and mercy when I’m broken. Allow me to have enough faith in me to stand on your word.
In the name of Yeshua Hamasiah, amen.

Take Courage In GOD

When we face obstacles in our relationships, marriages, and lives that seem insurmountable, don't be afraid. Seek God for courage instead. Moses' mother feared fro her son's life, but she didn't wallow in fear. In faith and with courage she took action - at great risk to herself - believing that God would protect him. God rewarded her trust in Him by keeping her son safe.

Moving ahead with boldness releases us from the bondage of fear. Never allow worry or dread to keep you from the wonderful plans He has for us. With God on our side, nothing needs to send us into a panic. He excels in conquering evil with good!

So take a deep breath. Let God's courage infuse you as you take your next step. (Exodus 1:8-16: 2:1-10)

Not Alone

“Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the LORD will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; He will neither fail you nor abandon you." (Deuteronomy 31:8)

You may be tempted to drown yourself in a pool of self-pity at the times you feel lonely. But remind yourself that God is with you, and will continue to be with you even to the end of the age. (Matthew 28:20) 

When you’re up against giants that seem impossible to defeat and you feel like you don’t have an ounce of strength left, God has said, “When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown. When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you.” (Isaiah 43:2)

When the devil tells you that you’re a lonely, miserable wreck, remind him that he’s the wreck and you’re the victor because Christ lives inside you!

High-Five

This is kinda rude, but this is how I really feel right now about certain people. Or person. :D

But I will not let the devil steal my peace. No matter what people say or do, no matter what circumstances are, no matter how break my heart, I will stay in His shalom, in GOD's peace.

God's Hands

Here's a fact..

God's hands are bigger than ours. Who else has held the oceans in His hand? Who has measured off the heavens with His fingers? (Isaiah 40:12) That big, to be precise. Logically who would be able to hold on to more? Mortal man or the Immortal God? The Immortal God obviously, so when we hold on to something really tight, we're bound to lose it. 

But God, whose hands hold the stars and

 oceans, can hold our entire world and not flinch when trouble comes, because He knows He is more powerful than anything in the universe. When you give something to God, you're investing into your future. God is better than the best bank. He will safeguard your belongings and add to them as you continue to trust Him.

If we hang on tightly to the things we love, in our own strength, we make perfect prey for the thief. He will come when you're not ready and take it away from you. But if he sees that God is holding on to the things you love, he will not bother trying to steal it, because he knows that he is no match for the Almighty God who can crush his skull in a nanosecond. So you see, God is the safest place you can run to in times of happiness, turmoil and pain. He will always protect you and your loved ones. 

Another Handsome

This is not just a random thought because I find myself thinking about it every now and then. I grew up fantasying that I will marry my childhood friend. You know someone I “played” mummy and daddy with. We would lose touch and fate will bring us back together and chemistry will happen. This fantasy was fueled by my desire to witness at least a minute of my future husband’s early years. 

The idea of meeting a total stranger and having them “tell” me about their past scares me. What if they aren't completely truthful, like the American who recently discovered that his pretty wife use to be a man. lol 

Anyways, girls have become women and all my childhood friends are married or “seriously” engaged, so good bye fantasy! I am currently single and looking (not searching, because ground never level-romANCE without finANCE is nuisANCE. lol) 

And every day as I pass by the many handsome gentlemen I ask myself; “Is that him”?

Hmm, I know you are out there, somewhere out there. So I ask, how are you doing right now? 

• Is life treating you well? 

• Are you eating healthy? 
• Are you caring for your (my) body? 
• Are you overcoming your challenges? 
• Are you getting the necessary resources to power your dreams? 
• Are you working at developing yourself daily? 
• Are you mixing with the right people? 
• Are you happy? 
• Is love making you cry? 
• Is situation making you vulnerable? 
• Do you think of me? 
• Do you pray for me? 

Whatever your answers are or will be, I will surely find you. And when I do, your past will not matter; only your future with me will. My gaze will captivate you, my lips will whisper joy, my touch will heal you, my hands will hold and caress you, and my heart will love you.

Mon amour, how are you doing, my future hubby?

A New Friend

Hari ini saya pengen cerita tentang sesuatu. Today I met a guy. His name is Walter. We met on a website called Tongue Exchange. I was trying to improve my Spanish dan website ini merupakan web yang membantu orang2 yang ingin belajar bahasa2 di dunia.

Awalnya waktu lagi searching on "people" section, niatnya cuma pengen liat2 doang, dan Walter adalah salah satu yang masuk kategori seumuran ama saya. Pengennya sih ketemunya ama yang seumuran, punya interest yang sama dan of course bicara bahasa yg sama.

Di data2 yg tersedia di TS, Walter is from Argentina, was born in 1975, speaking in English, Italian and Spanish, and yang paling penting: single.

So I added him to become my friends, and then he accepted.

That's it. A New friend.